A quick blurb on the "Openness" of God

In my Christian History and Theology Class, we are wrestling with the Theologies of a classic (Augustinian/Calvinist) view of God's sovereignty and an "Open" view that gives room for free will.
I am going to have to say that I am leaning towards the "openness" perspective at this point. My reasons for this are many, but I am going to share my most personal reasons.
My father was diagnosed in March of 1999 with stage 4b esophageal cancer. Over the course of the following year my father slowly and painfully wasted away and died in March of 2000. In July of 1999 my then fiancee's father was diagnosed with cancer who also slowly and painfully wasted away and died in August of 2000. I cannot believe that a good God wanted two of his faithful servants to suffer in that extreme and cause that degree of pain and horror to rule the lives of their families. Such a God would be evil. If Augustine and Calvin were correct, then I am happy that Jesus suffered and died so that God could at least get a taste of the pain He so freely deals out.

The question to me is an essential character of God issue, and to say that "If God does it, it is good." merely sidesteps the issue of the morality revealed to us. While goodness can seem relative at times, there is a progression and direction towards wholeness and well being of all that is the common element. This evasion is not a valid argument if God's actions go against the direction that we see goodness is working towards.